Pornography Will Destroy You


  1. Never before have men had so much temptation to female flesh and visual sex available to them daily.
  2. The first line of attack against any sin is direct Bible references and the related principles of scripture.
  3. The second line of attack against any sin is the consequences of engaging in that sin that will ruin you.
  4. God’s laws are not merely divine choices for our lives but the best way to live our lives (I John 5:3).
  5. Drunkenness is an example … first Eph 5:18 … and then the consequences in Proverbs e.g. 23:29-35.
  6. The same approach is followed here in condemning pornography for Christians by sin and problems.
  7. The following material is not salacious – it does not provide much gratuitous pleasure for the foolish.


  1. Porn is sexual material designed to stimulate man’s natural sexual desire.
    1. It can be any material arousing sexual interest apart from your spouse.
    2. Though there is a huge industry intentionally using it to make money.
    3. Many Christian men pervert “innocent” material for their own lusts.
    4. It does not have to be x-rated, total nudity, or perverse to be porn.
  2. Because men are highly sensitive to visual stimulation, it is the usual mode.
    1. Men are instinctively and instantaneously aroused highly by sight.
    2. Flashing the picture of a beautiful woman scantily clad causes arousal.
    3. Women cannot understand: they are aroused differently and slowly.
    4. Foolish women mock and ridicule pornography to their own peril.
  3. Pornography may not be pictorial; filthy speech and novels can also qualify.
    1. Filthy talking whores for a credit card number have been popular.
    2. Novels with filthy stories to excite the imagination are just as evil.
  4. Powerful images are now more available than ever in the world’s history.
    1. Photography, printing, and publishing create the magazine industry.
      1. A legion of glossy, inexpensive magazines are down the street.
      2. Novels, calendars, books, manuals, and printed porn abound.
    2. Television, cable, and video create the movie and video industry.
      1. Television programming and advertising constantly use sex.
      2. Movie rentals like Amazon or Netflix include pornography.
      3. The local cable company will install unlimited channels of filth.
    3. Theaters offer the latest in audio/video perfection for pornography.
      1. What woman can resist an invitation to a movie . . . to her ruin?
      2. This powerful medium hypes the images and religion of hell.
    4. Internet websites, chat rooms, and email create the cybersex industry.
      1. Porn has been by far the largest industry using the Internet.
      2. Still photos, videos, stories, diaries, surveys, letters, chatting, talking, live strippers, or virtual sex of any size, color, nationality, age, preference, or perversion are a “click” away.
      3. Playboy magazine will no longer feature nudes (2015) due to all the free pictorial spreads and video pornography on the Internet.
      4. Selfies and filming by friends by wicked women have created an unlimited source of free videos of nudity, sex, and much more.
    5. Good men can now view it secretly at home or the office without risk.
    6. Any filthy, vile lust can be fed with total anonymity for the first time.
    7. No generation has ever had 5% of the availability we presently face.
  5. It is a common temptation for men, and our sons will experiment with it.
    1. How many fathers address this issue carefully with their children?
    2. How many pastors warn their churches of its horrible consequences?
    3. It should be addressed, for it is a popular device of Satan to destroy.
    4. Women and sex have been the greatest source of destruction for men.


  1. God has revealed His absolute will in the Holy Scriptures (II Tim 3:16-17).
    1. We know sin by learning God’s holy commandments (Romans 7:7).
    2. We esteem His rules and hate anything contrary (Psalm 119:128).
  2. God designed and created the woman, invented sex, ordained marriage, and made all for the man: He must know optimal use for optimal pleasure.
    1. God’s will is sexual holiness (I Thess 4:1-8; I Corinthians 6:15-20).
    2. God’s will is marital pleasure (Pr 5:19; Ec 9:9; I Co 7:1-5; Heb 13:4).
    3. God created a woman’s body to be very attractive to men (Gen 6:2; 12:11; 24:16; 29:17; II Sam 11:2; 13:1; Song 4:1-7; 7:1-9; 8:8-10).
  3. God’s Word is not silent when it comes to condemning this sexual sin.
    1. Desiring a wife is good (Deut 5:21; 21:10-13; Prov 18:22; I Cor 7:2).
    2. Desiring another’s wife is sin (Exodus 20:17; Jer 5:7-9; Matt 5:28).
    3. Desiring a single woman for sex is sin (Job 31:1; Proverbs 24:9).
    4. Husbands are commanded to be totally and always happy visually and emotionally with their wives (Pr 5:15-23). This is the most direct and condemning verse in the Bible about pornography and other women.
    5. Single men are commanded to mortify the deeds of the flesh or get married (Pr 6:6-23; Col 3:5-7; I Thes 4:3-7; I Jn 2:15-17; I Cor 7:2,9).
    6. God knows about pornographic images rather clearly (Ezek 23:13-16).
  4. The rule is simple – we cannot look at other women to get sexual pleasure.
    1. Our wives’ breasts and love must satisfy. It is God’s law (Pr 5:15-23).
    2. Any other woman is a strange woman – not rightly ours, an outsider – and illegal for any sexual pleasure (Pr 2:16; 5:3,20; 6:24; 7:5; 23:27).
    3. We cannot see and desire other women (Ps 101:3; Pr 6:25; Mat 5:28).
    4. We cannot even think foolishly of fornication (Job 31:1; Prov 24:9).
    5. Pleasure in sin of others – entertainment or friends – is sin (Rom 1:32).
    6. Contentment is a commandment, not a circumstance (Hebrews 13:4-6).


  1. God made the woman and invented sex, but we have perverted it (Ecc 7:29).
  2. Rather than build a real, personal, fulfilling, and emotional relationship with a loyal woman for optimal sexual pleasure and peace, porn destroys this glorious potential by replacing it with dead images of drugged, filthy sluts.
  3. Dead images of drugged, defiled, filthy, and depraved sluts are chosen over our kind, faithful, loving, and gentle wives, who gladly bear our children, serve our needs, forgive our faults, and cheerfully sacrifice their lives for us.
  4. Heterosexual men fascinated with lesbians; virgin-expecting men fascinated with public sewers; fastidious men fascinated with polluted sluts; possessive men fascinated with conniving whores; pornography is very perverse.
  5. See honorable men give their wealth to the basest of human scum (Pr 5:10).
  6. See honest and careful men crave trick photography of silicon-bloated sluts.
  7. Advanced porn is sodomy, bestiality, sadism, masochism, necrophilia, pedophilia, incest, feces, golden showers, gerbils, piercings, stuffing, etc.


  1. It lies boldly: this isn’t going to hurt you or anyone else, go ahead, enjoy it.
  2. It lies boldly: you can’t be happy unless you satisfy all your sexual desires.
  3. It lies boldly: it is better than committing fornication, so help yourself out.
  4. It lies boldly: since God made the woman, you should enjoy His creation.
  5. It lies boldly: as long as you are having sex with your wife, it’s no problem.
  6. It lies boldly: if you give up this innocent diversion, holiness will bore you.
  7. It lies boldly: something that looks this good and feels this good can’t be sin.
  8. It lies boldly: since you don’t know the women, there can be nothing wrong.
  9. It lies boldly: since your wife gave her permission, then there is no sin in it.
  10. It lies boldly: since it revved up sex with your wife last night, it has profit.


  1. You lose appreciation, desire, sensitivity, and pleasure from your own wife.
  2. Porn uses rare women, cosmetic surgery, perfect prepping, sensual training, expensive props, and trick photography to create fantasy images.
  3. Your wife is imperfect, bears children, ages, and has no artificial assistance.
  4. She cannot compete, no matter how hard she tries, with this fantasy image for at least four reasons: (1) inferior looks and props, (2) familiarity breeds contempt, (3) she doesn’t have a slut’s soul, and (4) sin always lies again.
  5. Your wife has a soul, fears God, serves you daily, bears your children, forgives your faults, and faithfully stays loyal; but you prefer odious sluts.
  6. The precious traits of character and companionship you loved in the beginning are replaced with fixation on body parts and bare performance.
  7. Making love with your wife is reduced to impersonal sex with body parts.
  8. Instead of an honored and cherished wife, she is an orgiastic receptacle only.


  1. You will require more and more explicit pornography for the same pleasure.
    1. Pictures of women in swimming suits only “satisfy” for a little while.
    2. Porn reduces sexual sensitivity: do not be deceived by sin’s great lie.
    3. It will not make you more sensitive sexually than it made Eve a god.
    4. Like a drug, you will need more explicit images to get the same rush.
    5. Any short-term increased desire must be sought again with less effect.
    6. Your wife and mild pornography will only work together for a while.
  2. The trend over the last fifty years shows the need for more explicitness.
    1. The degree of nakedness in legal pornography has increased greatly.
    2. The rapid growth of perversion in the last thirty years also proves it.
  3. A continual barrage of perfect images dulls your mind to your ordinary wife.
    1. A man plowing with a mule all day would crave even his ugly wife.
    2. You will be as many men today – the grasshopper dies (Ec 12:5); why do you think Viagra is such a success in this “free” generation?


  1. You will excite your sexual desires to a level of great danger and risk.
    1. It was David’s view of a beautiful woman bathing that brought sin.
    2. This high level of excitement will be satisfied less and less by a wife.
    3. You will create a constant need for sexual satisfaction while awake.
    4. Any opportunity for other sexual sins will be very difficult to resist.
    5. Your natural and spiritual inhibitions to sin will be crushed to death.
    6. What should be only one of many physical appetites becomes the god.
    7. Contentment with holding your wife tenderly and talking to her will be replaced with frustration to find happiness in mere orgasms.
  2. In this society, there are certain lusts we need to suppress in order to survive.
    1. Making no provision for the flesh (Rom 13:14) condemns all porn.
    2. Prudent men foresee evil and hide themselves by avoiding it (Pr 22:3).


  1. Like drugs, it takes greater and greater mastery until you cannot put it down.
  2. Why do we have a new term in America – sexual addiction? We created it.
  3. Experience teaches this lesson clearly and repeatedly. Believe the warning.
  4. Ted Bundy was a serial rapist and killer, who confessed to this addiction.
  5. It binds with cords and destroys souls as God describes (Prov 5:22; 6:32).
  6. One cigarette does not addict; one a day may not; but try a few every day.
  7. But just one look at pornography leaves an image you cannot destroy easily.
  8. True freedom is doing what you should do and stopping what you should not do, rather than doing whatever you want without ability to do what is right.


  1. You will reduce the satisfaction of your marital relationship with your wife.
    1. The main tenet of pornography is whoredom with many partners.
    2. The routine of the same woman compared to infinite variety is boring.
    3. Godly spouses not on drugs and without a slut’s heart do not go crazy with animal passion as porn illustrates in its distortion of women.
    4. You both will be frustrated, disillusioned, unhappy, and discontented.
  2. You will create a “mistress” for yourself rather than loving your wife.
  3. You will create an “escape” for yourself rather than work on problems.
  4. Pornography cannot enhance a marriage – it can only destroy a marriage.
  5. Pornography resents monogamy and praises polygamy, sodomy, orgies, etc.


  1. You will reduce respect for the women you know due to physical fixation.
    1. Pornography creates an obsession with only the bodies of women.
    2. God exalts women for character traits over physical beauty (Pr 31:30).
    3. Men have always admired a woman’s gentle, sweet, loyal, effeminate, and kind spirit, but you will be measuring her in terms of sweaty sex.
    4. Instead of recognizing character and spiritual traits, you will be unable to resist categorizing women by various body parts and base sexuality.
    5. Rather than admire a virtuous woman for love of God, spiritual fruit, and great service to husband and children, you will debase her for a small bust, modest clothing, and lack of a forward, flirtatious spirit.
  2. The noble virtue of protecting and honoring women is lost for sexploitation.
    1. Instead of honorable giving to women, they are used for sex and left.
    2. Chivalry is exchanged for getting all you can from a few body parts.
    3. Rather than what you can do for a woman, you see what you can get.
    4. Far from protecting the virtue of all women, you now crave to destroy.
  3. It reduces the gracious, gentle, kind woman to a mere grunting, sweating slut.
  4. It reduces the loyal, serving, faithful woman to a conniving, cheating whore.


  1. The philosophy taught by all pornographic sources is anti-God, anti-Bible, anti-church, anti-marriage, anti-family, anti-authority, anti-everything true.
  2. Be not deceived: you cannot see the pictures and reject the philosophy, for the author of both is a lion waiting for the opening you give with a peak.
  3. The noble, open, honest man becomes a lying, hiding, sneaking pervert.
  4. The bold and righteous man becomes a fearful and timid man (Prov 28:1).
  5. If a man cannot rule porn, then he will lose control elsewhere (Pr 25:28).


  1. You will assume all women are like the pornographic models in looks.
    1. Young men will be disappointed quickly, even on their honeymoons.
    2. No woman looks like the typical pornographic fantasy image.
    3. Your wife cannot exercise enough or buy enough bra padding.
    4. Male sexual dysfunction has pornography to thank for much trouble.
  2. You will assume all women are like the pornographic models in desires.
    1. They don’t crave animalistic sex twenty-five hours a day from you.
    2. They won’t do half the positions, contortions, or acts you have seen.
    3. They don’t want other men, multiple men, a woman, and so forth.
    4. They only endure anything but tender, missionary-style lovemaking.
  3. You miss the beauty, comfort, and reward of a virtuous and gracious wife.
  4. If you try to treat your wife as the porn models, you will only offend her.


  1. It destroys manly confidence by promoting a make-believe fantasy world.
    1. You will learn you are a looker and not a doer. Real men are doers.
    2. You will learn you could not attract such women even if you tried.
    3. You will learn you could not satisfy such illusionary women either.
    4. Little boys sneak pictures of naked women; real men love one woman.
  2. Real lovers know how to take a woman and create eternal adoration.
    1. The best sex is reserved for men who seduce their wives without sex.
    2. Tenderness, kindness, patience, compliments, and affection are manly.
    3. Little perverts who can’t think any higher than their orgasms are fems.
  3. Real men rule their passions for godliness; weak men cannot control them.
  4. How manly is a guy with a chain and collar around his neck? A porn slave!
  5. Heavy use of pornography leads men down the steps into the hell of sodomy.


  1. You will ignore your wife to have sex with her body without any affection.
    1. Why do you think the popularity of positions other than face-to-face?
    2. Why do you think the popularity of other forms of sexual release?
    3. If you have sex without kissing, you are just a John with a prostitute.
    4. God knows the perfect position for lovemaking (Solomon 2:6; 8:3).
    5. Happiness and fulfillment is giving to your wife – not wanting more.
  2. It will condition you to think only in terms of body parts and dimensions.
    1. A woman’s body should never be separated from her soul and heart.
    2. The justification that you do not know the women is this very error.
    3. If you are always measuring and comparing little parts here and there, you will miss the fulfillment of making love with a whole woman.
  3. Sex becomes its own end, which will not bring happiness to either of you.
    1. Orgiastic sex without love is merely like animals mating without love.
    2. Sex is part of intimate lovemaking rather than a mechanical function.
    3. If performance is more important than the person, your soul has died.
    4. You will become greatly frustrated and unhappy without true love.


  1. When your wife finds your porn, it will slice her soul in half with a knife.
    1. If she tells you she does not mind, she is lying or hiding her own sins.
    2. If she tells you she does not mind, she is trying to be a “good” wife.
    3. If she tells you she does not mind, she will mind more in the future.
    4. You planted the seed of bitterness and hatred that grows into a tree.
  2. You will take away all the motivation God put in her heart to serve you.
  3. You will destroy her sexual capacity to please you with fearful insecurity.
    1. Women can have far more sexual pleasure and response than men.
    2. In the Creator’s plan, a man’s greatest pleasure is his wife’s response.
    3. But there are two things that will destroy her ability – fear and pain.
    4. Addiction and preference to pornography creates fearful insecurity.
    5. She will know you’re having sex with her with your heart elsewhere.
    6. She will know only a few body parts interest you rather than herself.
    7. Isn’t this wise? A man craving sex destroys his wife’s erotic ability.
  4. You create a wife exceeding vulnerable to a man’s attention and affection.
  5. You create a wife with a secret heart longing to be loved by anyone else.


  1. Adultery with a woman leaves you a piece of bread (Pr 6:26), what of this?
  2. Adultery with a woman destroys your soul (Pr 6:32; Mt 5:28), what of this?
  3. Adultery with a woman takes you to hell (Pr 5:5; 7:27; 9:18), what of this?
  4. Adultery with a woman destroys the heart (Ps 51:10-12), what of this?
  5. Adultery with a woman violates the Spirit (I Cor 6:15-20), what of this?
  6. The destination of those whose eyes are full of adultery is hell (II Pet 2:14).
  7. It gives Satan a large open door to steal your soul and enflame your lusts, and this opening is not recovered easily but by great grace (II Tim 2:25-26).
  8. The cords of sexual sins will bind you up and leave you trapped (Prov 5:22).


  1. If you young men never get started, you will never have to suffer or fear it.
    1. What will you miss? Pain, frustration, disappointment, guilt, shame!
    2. Even one look will cost you, for the images will not leave your mind.
    3. Do you want to have a great marriage and make love daily? Hate porn!
    4. If pleasures of sin for seconds cost long-term happiness, it is here.
  2. It starts out “innocently” with ads of bras, panties, bathing suits; National Geographic, women’s catalogs, Newsweek pictures and articles; Sports Illustrated, People magazine, grocery tabloids, album covers, calendars, etc.
  3. Then it often moves on to sex textbooks, marriage manuals, novels, etc.
  4. It finds fertile ground in television programming, movies, and video rentals.
  5. And then it moves to strictly pornographic magazines, movies, and websites.


  1. Your deceitful heart will begin defending you to justify your wickedness.
  2. It does not matter if your wife allows it or participates. God condemns it.
    1. Women are weak and silly, easily deceived, and trying to please you.
    2. You cannot measure righteousness by the weaker vessel but by God.
  3. Any temporary “bang” you get with your wife from it is foolish lie from hell.
    1. A soft-porn movie (sin with words) with a wife may bring passion.
    2. But the passion is devilish, physical only, and caused by other women.
    3. It will not last but a few hours and will require porn to bring it back.
    4. If you think it is enhancing your marriage, you are a deceived idiot.
  4. Television is a great evil. It is constantly frustrating by teasing continually.
    1. Every program on television, comedies or dramas, uses sex to entice.
    2. Many advertisements use sex to sell, because they prey on our lusts.
    3. The constant carnal messages and sensual images will steal your soul.
    4. Since the law limits teasing of television, you will need to go to porn.
  5. The libertarian lie about victimless crimes forgets God, you, and your wife.
    1. What will the libertarian say when standing before the living God?
    2. Both model and viewer may have consented, but the sinful heart carefully disguises and hides the incredible damage being done.
  6. When your marriage is hurting, go to the Lord instead of a worse evil.
    1. Trouble with your wife is not an excuse to find other women to enjoy.
    2. Trouble with a wife means you have not done your duty as husband.
    3. Confession, unselfish love, the Lord, and wise counsel can save you.
  7. Every carnal influence you allow will pull at your porn lust, for there is nothing more exciting to the natural man than nakedness of another woman.
  8. God ordained monthly periods and pregnancy, so don’t use these as excuses.


  1. Jesus Christ died to save us from the sin of pornography, as all other sins.
  2. If we repent, repudiate our sin, and acknowledge its folly, we can be saved.
    1. Job 33:27-28 is the single best passage identifying this procedure.
    2. I John 1:9 and Proverbs 28:13 also teach us the victory of confession.
    3. II Corinthians 7:10-11 demands full-blown, all-out repentance.
  3. We then need to replace that filthy trash with the Word of God (Ps 119:9).
  4. Then we need to learn and live true godliness to suffocate and kill our lusts.
    1. Which is godly: having what you want or wanting what you have?
    2. Confess your faults to another, and pray for one another (James 5:16).
    3. Love your wife and keep sex part of loving rather than an end itself.
    4. Learn to love your wife for all of her being rather than just body parts.
  5. Seek with God’s help to develop a holy hatred for all worldly influences.


  1. Never buy a porn magazine: this is pretty obvious, isn’t it, for anyone?
  2. Eliminate all movies: this includes the theater, television, and video rentals.
  3. Turn off the television: its carnal message and sensual images will tease you.
  4. Restrict the Internet: cancel it, use a sex block, put the computer in the open.
  5. Confess and forsake all fantasies: even the thought of foolishness is sin.
  6. Eliminate jokes about sex: only fools make a mock at sin, and sex is noble.
  7. Condemn romantic novels for women: they are an equivalent sin for wives.
  8. Confess your problem to your wife and solicit her understanding and help.
    1. Reject her understanding or forgiveness as approval. God hates it!
    2. A good wife will rebuke you for sin, and you should encourage it.
  9. Give her permission and direction to rat you out to a brother/pastor.
  10. Run away from temptation; don’t walk or talk or consider. Flee from it!
  11. Be ready to pluck out an eye or cut off a hand in sexual lusts (Matt 5:27-32).
  12. God sees sexual sins, and He will get you. Read Proverbs 5:19-23 carefully.

For Further Study:

  1. Another Baptist minister’s approach, Dolph Painter, is found below on pages 10-13 of this document.
  2. Slide Presentation: Pornography.
  3. Slide Presentation: Techno Sins.
  4. Proverb Commentary: Proverbs 5:19.
  5. Proverb Commentary: Proverbs 6:25.
  6. Proverb Commentary: Proverbs 7:18.
  7. Proverb Commentary: Sex Topic.
  8. Marriage Covenant: Sample Covenant.
  9. Sermon Outline: Matthew 5:27-32.
  10. Sermon Outline: Your Husband’s a Fool.
  11. Sermon Outline: Forgotten Sins.

Other Links (no endorsements intended):

  1. XXXChurch.
  2. First Stone.
  3. Got Questions.
  4. ERLC of the Southern Baptists.
  5. Pornography Sin? 
  6. Answers in Genesis.
  7. Jesus-Is-Savior website.
  8. BCC.

Sexual Purity

A quick assessment:

  1. Do you lock onto attractive women when they come near you?
  2. Do you seek out sexually arousing articles or pictures in magazines?
  3. Do risqué internets sites or R-rated movies provide you sexual gratification?
  4. Do you have behaviors you keep from your wife (or parents)?
  5. Do any of these activities provide an emotional release or a sense of coping?
  6. If you’ve answered yes to any of the questions above, you are lurking at the door of sexual addiction.
  7. Every Man’s Battle, co-authored by Stephen Arterburn & Fred Stoeker

And thou, Solomon my son, know thou the God of thy father, and serve Him with a perfect heart and with a willing mind: for the LORD searcheth all hearts, and understandeth all the imaginations of the thoughts: if thou seek Him, He will be found of thee; but if thou forsake Him, He will cast thee off for ever. Take heed now; for the LORD hath chosen thee to build an house for the sanctuary: be strong, and do it – 1Ch 28:9-10.

This instruction was given by David to Solomon, a father to his adult son:

  1. Serve God with a perfect heart and a willing mind
  2. for God searches hearts and imagined thoughts
  3. Diligently seek God, do not forsake Him
  4. Be strong, build a God-honoring house
  5. Follow the pattern I have laid out for thee (v. 11, 19)

David wasn’t specifically addressing sexual purity; but maybe he should have. A N.T. parallel:

  1. Eph 5:3 – Let fornication, uncleanness, or covetousness not once be named among you
  2. Matt 5:28 – Whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery
  3. Luke 6:46 – Why call me, Lord, Lord, and do not the things which I say?
  4. Josh 24:15 – but as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD
  5.  2Ti 3:16-17 – all scripture is profitable for reproof, correction, and instruction in righteousness

Let no man say when he is tempted, I am tempted of God: for God cannot be tempted with evil, neither tempteth he any man: But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed. Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death – Jam 1:13-15.

Sexual Purity is keeping the body, the heart, and the mind pure:

  1. God invented sex. Between husband and wife it is good; but outside of marriage, it’s sin – Heb 13:4
  2. Young men, marriage is not the cure. Old habits fill voids (travel, pregnancy, illness, cyclical, …).
    1. Often men who convert to Christianity trade Playboy for Sports Illustrated, physical affairs for mental affairs. They ask, “How far can I go and still be called a Christian?” They say no, but don’t really mean no.
    2. Their struggles are not with the act, but with thoughts, pictures, or videos; however, action often follows uncontrolled thoughts. Nevertheless, thoughts are sin even if actions do not follow (1Th 4:3-5, 7).
    3. Nine out of ten boys have been exposed to pornography between the ages of 11 and 14.
  3. God is grieved by the adulterous heart of men of all ages – Ezek 6:9
    1. Mark 7:21-23 – For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed evil thoughts, adulteries, fornications …
    2. Act 15:29 – Abstain from … fornication, if ye keep yourselves from ye do well
    3. Rom 13:12-13 – Cast off the works of darkness: drunkenness, wantonness, envy
  4. There is forgiveness in these matters. The AA mentality keeps people guilty for life, God’s does not (2Cor 5:11)
  5. By all means, we ought to avoid the “holier than thou” attitude like the plague (Is 65:5)

I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members. O wretched man that I am! Who shall deliver me from the body of this death? – Rom 7:23-24

The human body can work for us or against us:

  1. The human body and brain has built in a set of intense emotional, biological, and chemical connections during the sexual process. These connections bind a husband and wife together in very profitable ways.
  2. Pornography “mimics” or “counterfeits” these built in connections. Its goal is to ignite, excite, and exploit these natural urges. These connections bind viewers to images in very unprofitable ways.
  3. The human brain releases a tidal wave of neurochemicals during the sexual process. Consider a few:
    1. Dopamine: narrows focus, ignores negatives, and creates relationship dependencies
      1. Healthy relationship – creates and builds lasting relationships
      2. During Porn – ignores or blocks out thoughts of spouse, beliefs, and/or consequences
      3. Dopamine is highly addictive, more so than cocaine
      4. And it came to pass in an eveningtide, that David arose from off his bed, and walked upon the roof of the king’s house: and from the roof he saw a woman washing herself; and the woman was very beautiful to look upon. And David sent messengers, and took her; and she came in unto him, and he lay with her; – 2Sam 11:2, 4.
    2. Norpinephrine: causes the smallest details of an experience during its release to be seared into the brain
      1. Healthy relationship – binds couples together, creates fondness
      2. During Porn – the details of an airbrushed model are burned into the brain like a branding iron
    3. Oxytocin – creates an intense bonding, causes milk to be released
      1. Healthy relationship – man and woman bond like a mother to her new born infant, forever
      2. During Porn – imagine the same intensity of a mother bonding to her infant as one to a perverted image
    4. Epinephrine – stimulates the body to elevate blood pressure, dilate bronchioles, & increase heart rate. The same chemical paramedics inject into patients to bring them out of shock.
      1. The male body secretes this hormone with visual stimulus nine times more easily than does the female
      2. Secretion may occur with visual stimulus or the recollection of a sexual images
      3. Epinephrine is also more addictive than cocaine, the body purges cocaine, but it cannot purge an image.
    5. Serotonin – causes deep calmness, satisfaction, releases stress, and causes the wide perspective to return
      1. This is “the drug of choice” by many to escape the trials and pressures of life
      2. Serotonin is the most addictive of the endogenous chemicals
      3. Howbeit he would not hearken unto her voice: but, being stronger than she, forced her, and lay with her. Then Amnon hated her exceedingly; so that the hatred wherewith he hated her was greater than the love wherewith he had loved her. And Amnon said unto her, Arise, be gone. – 2Sa 13:14-15.
  4. Fractional addiction occurs when there exists a compulsion for the chemical high or the gratification it brings
    1. Like any addiction, sexual addiction is progressive. The cure is to quit cold turkey, to despise the sin.
    2. Addictive sex is: devoid of relationship, sex for its own sake, hidden from others, leaves no room to give to others, leaves saints feeling guilty, or used to escape pain or problems.
  5. Sexual addiction is bondage, a willing spirit but a weak flesh (Matt 26:41).
    1. Sex addiction is like athlete’s foot & poison ivy. Scratching promises relief, but only intensifies the itching
    2. Sexual impurity is a series of bad choices, as is holiness a series of good choices (Rom 7:15-22).
  6. The male body has two seminal vessels (sacs) which fill to capacity after 72 hours
    1. The male is extra sensitized to sexual stimulus (visual or physical) when these sacs are filled
    2. Therefore, a trial for a man on day one of a business trip is not nearly the temptation on day three of a trip.
  7. Repetition and visual form deep ruts in the brain, making certain behaviors automatic.

Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man love the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world – 1Jo 2:15-16.

Sexual Purity can occur only when a man hates his sin, when he is ready to change (Col 3:5-6)

  1. Imagine all sexual gratification (physical, visual, and mental) coming from our wives.
    1. When we get our eyes under control (bill boards, joggers, internet, immodest clothing) will we be pure
    2. When we fight the highs and gratification received through our eyes can we begin to be pure
    3. Good news: as eye stimulus is reduced both chemical dependence and natural physical pressures lessen
  2. Christian men, we must recognize and fight Satan’s lies:
    1. We are not helpless victims, and being addicted to sex is not part of being a man (Rom 13:12-13)
    2. When we say, “I have no right to look at that.” we give Satan no opportunity.
    3. But as soon as we ask, “Should I look?” We begin a conversation and are subject to Satan’s lies.
    4. Most folks are under the delusion porn affects others, and they are exempt
    5. Sexuality in our society is so subtle and pervasive, often we don’t recognize it or have become immune to it
  3. Internet pornography is becoming the primary sex educator of adolescents.
    1. Their scripts define beauty standards, expectations, and the role of women
    2. These scripts often include aggression (physical & verbal), perversions, and sex outside of marriage
    3. Adult attitudes and expectations also change with extended viewing (violence, intimacy, roles …)
  4. We must be like Eleazor who stood his ground even when all those around him retreated (2Sa 23:9-10)
    1. Porn-ography and Python are derived from the same root word, to slowly squeeze the life out of a thing
    2. Whether naïve or rebellious, God’s word is the cure – we cannot mix our standards with God’s standards.
    3. For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he (Pr 23:7); we can flood our hearts with God’s word or garbage.

I made a covenant with my eyes; why then should I think upon a maid? (Job 31:1)

Lust – any look that creates a chemical high, it happens quicker than you think

  1. Bounce eyes away from sexual sights, pretty women, or pictures (2Co 5:10).
  2. Focus eyes only on our wife (Pr 5:15, 18-19). Illustrative Question: Where are my sexual bowls filled?
  3. Josiah wept over sin as God’s word humbled him (2Ch 34:27)
    1. Excellence is a mixed standard, when we measure ourselves against our peers
    2. Obedience is a fixed standard, when we have no tolerance for sin we move closer to God.
  4. Gird up the loins of our mind (1Pe 1:13); starve the mind of memories and lust objects
    1. Do not lurk at thy neighbor’s door (Job 31:9-11); friends’ wives, co-workers, receptionists, tellers
    2. Step away from the entrapping whore (Pr 7:21-23) and the woman in heat (Jer 2:24).
    3. Keep our marriage vow of abandoning all others, including models and actresses we do not know
    4. Minimize female interaction, be nerdy, matter of fact, and do not place added stipulations on our wives

Watch ye, stand fast in the faith, quit you like men, be strong. Let all your things be done with charity – 1Co 16:13-14.

Real men hear God’s word and do it.

  1. We do not count on God to take away our desire. We take actions to remove those desires (1Co 6:13, 18)
  2. We do not count on God to carry us, but we count on Him to walk with us.
  3. We admit that our culture has manipulated us and we set out to destroy its negative influences (Jude 7).
  4. We do not offer parts of our life to God, we offer all of it (Rom 6:11-14).
  5. We rid ourselves of all leaven, knowing a little leaven causes dough to rise (Israel rarely put away all impurities)
  6. We concede we cannot win until we hate the sin and purge all of it.
  7. We realize Christ made us free from sexual impurity, but He did not free us from the habit of sexual impurity.
  8. We do not concern ourselves with people in the world. A brother is my concern, but not the world (1Co 5:9-13).
  9. We understand accountability to others is needful, and encouragement to and from others is profitable
  10. We reject the victim mentality and continually look for the escape God has provided (1Co 10:13).
  11. We cherish women (the joy of our life), we do not consume them (2Sa 12:1-4)

If ye fulfil the royal law according to the scripture, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself, ye do well – Jam 2:8

Pornography rewires a person’s brain so that fulfilling the royal law becomes nearly impossible

  1. The addict becomes a taker, not a giver; he/she becomes self absorbed, self-centered
  2. The addict communicates less and less; intolerance for others, their thoughts and questions
  3. The addict becomes less satisfied with monogamous relationships, seeks variety and novelty
  4. The addict becomes less social; isolating him/herself more and more
  5. The addict becomes abusive to self and others; physically and verbally
  6. The addict becomes reclusive; embarrassed by guilt and shame he/she avoids others
  7. The addict’s sexual appetite grows in frequency and intensity (searches out harder core)
  8. The addict begins to feel a sense of entitlement; sexual fulfillment is a right no matter how achieved
  9. The addict becomes less sensitive to the law; rape, pedophile, incest, …
  10. The addict is unable to place another above self (1Jo 4:10-11)

And the LORD said, Shall I hide from Abraham that thing which I do; Seeing that Abraham shall surely become a great and mighty nation, and all the nations of the earth shall be blessed in him? For I know him, that he will command his children and his household after him, and they shall keep the way of the LORD, to do justice and judgment; that the LORD may bring upon Abraham that which He hath spoken of him – Gen 18:17-19.

Heads of Households:

  1. 1. First, we must recognize in ourselves and our sons: males have rebellious natures; we often find the straight & narrow boring; our sex drives are strong & regular; and that we receive sexual gratification through our eyes
  2. 2. Second, like the prodigal son, we must get up out of the mire and head home. The father loved his son unconditionally, but he did not unconditionally love his son’s behavior (Luke 15:18).
  3. 3. Third, we must drive our stake deep into the ground. From this day forward we desire to change the destiny of our families. We accept full responsibility.
  4. 4. Fourth, we must cherish our wives for who she is today. Her sexuality is a valuable possession and she gave it to us. Even if we don’t feel like cherishing her, we do it anyways. We act right & trust correct feelings will follow.
  5. 5. Fifth, by starving our eyes, we will find our wives and only our wives captivating. We desire to regain our relationship with: God, our wives, our children, and the body of Christ.
  6. 6. Sixth, in saving my sons from this battle – the energy they would use to fight sexual impurity shall be used for the glory of God, channeling that energy to His service.
  7. 7. Seventh, great marriages are rare; but they ought not to be. Our marriages ought to make our wives better persons than they were being single.
  8. 8. Finally, a pure man’s prayers pack a spiritual punch. As intercessors to God for our families, our prayers and communion with God will be much more effective and the impact will cascade down our family trees.

A list of verses to add to those in the outline above which may strengthen a saint during this battle:

Ps 119:37;  Prov 4:25,  6:25-27;  Matt 5:29-30;  1Co 6:18-20;  Eph 5:3;  Col 3:5;  Php 4:8, 13