He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes.
Loving parents spank their children. They start early, and they do not hold back. They want the best for their children, and they know spanking will help them succeed. They trust God and Solomon far more than today’s arrogant, ignorant, and bankrupt ideas.
This proverb is amazing. One short sentence will prove if you love God, if you fear God, if you love your children, and if you are wise. You cannot avoid these conclusions. If you do not spank your children, you have chosen to hate God, your children, and wisdom.
The lesson here is important, and it is repeated throughout Proverbs: corporal punishment works, and wise parents use it (Pr 3:12; 10:13; 19:18; 20:30; 22:15; 23:13-14; 26:3; 29:15,17). It is not open to debate. God has spoken, that settles it. 3000 years of recorded human history endorse it, and today’s dysfunctional youth confirm that they need it.
The world would be a better place, if parents obeyed this proverb. But most have been brainwashed by educators, politicians, and the news media against corporal punishment. Though a serious problem is seen everywhere – a generation of haughty, lazy, rebellious, selfish, and narcissistic youth – the world hates God and Solomon’s wisdom in the Bible.
What is a rod? It is a slender stick perfect for stripes on the backs of fools and foolish children. What is chastening? It is the use of the rod to create those wisdom marks. What is betimes? It is early when there is still hope for the child to be wise. What is sparing? It is deciding for whatever reason that you do not love your children enough to use the rod.
Do you love your son? Only hateful fathers do not spank sons. They love themselves too much to spend the effort, emotion, time, and short-term grief to confront and spank a child for his profit. The father that truly loves his son and wants him to be great will faithfully spank him at a young age when there is hope. If you do not use the rod, you hate your son; if you truly delight in him, you will correct and spank him (Pr 3:11-12).
True love is more than the mushy sentimentality of the modern heresy of unconditional love. True love is the sacrificial desire for the personal and spiritual welfare of another; it is doing what is necessary to help another person please God and men more perfectly. Of course, you cannot read about such love in Ben Spock’s books or Mad Magazine. This love is only known by Christians and only taught in the Bible. You can ignore all others.
True love is known by its goal and the choice of means to attain it. Godly parents want their children to grow in favor with God and man, the highest goal possible for human existence. And they use the God-inspired and time-proven means to achieve that goal – the rod and reproof (Pr 29:15). This is the highest degree of love a parent can have. Do you love your children this way and this much? There is no better idea, so embrace it!
Do you want the best for your child? He was born foolish, and you must drive it out of him, or you will send a foolish adult into the world to be punished by life and other authority figures (Pr 22:15). The rod gives wisdom, so not using it selfishly deprives your children of wisdom they need for success (Pr 29:15). The rod saves children from death and hell, so not using it chooses future pain and trouble for your children (Pr 23:13-14).
The only proven way to maximize character and success is to spank him. How can you guarantee a selfish, lazy, immature adult lacking the character necessary for life success? Cater to his whims, coddle his moods, allow him the freedom of his peers, and avoid any criticism or negativity that might disappoint him. This is what parents now call training. Try to enter any work animal in a competition that has not felt a bridle or whip (Pr 26:3).
Do you want joy and peace in old age? A child left to himself will shame his parents, but reproof and spanking make wise children (Pr 29:15,17). Do you know parents that live out their lives in grief for foolish, rebellious, or criminal children? You may be one yourself. They did not consistently spank their children when they were young to have joy of them later (Pr 10:1; 15:20; 17:21,25; 19:13; 22:6; 23:15-16,24-25; 29:3,15,17).
Here is a conflict: parents follow fuzzy feelings they call love to get children anything they want, let them do whatever they wish, and avoid anything that disappoints them. They think happy children are good children. These parents reinforce the foolishness of children and the sins of this generation – pride, laziness, rebellion, selfishness, etc.
Here is another conflict: Suzy Smartmouth of the PTA plasters signs around town that say, “Kids, you can’t beat ’em.” Doctor Dimwits, the school psychologist says spanking warps the personality and is no deterrent to bad behavior. Benjamin Spock and James Dobson join similar philosophies against Bible strictness (Pr 20:20; 30:17; Deut 27:16).
Who will you believe? The Creator God that designed the family unit has declared His will clearly and repeatedly. King Solomon the wisest king and philosopher in world history gave his inspired counsel and advice. Who will you believe? The United Nations and UNICEF, who propose children’s rights between warnings about global warming?
The world’s thinkers do not have a clue about parenting, especially the more education and/or intelligence they have. When a spoiled child in America kills school children, what is the response of educators, politicians, and the media? Gun control! Neither America nor the world needs gun control – they need child control taught in this proverb.
Grandparents once said, “Spare the rod, spoil the child”; the character of that generation to the character of this generation is like light to darkness. This generation says, “Kids, you can’t beat ’em.” Who is right? Those grandparents chose the inspiration of God, the wisdom of Solomon, and common sense. Today’s effeminate and permissive society bows to ignorant educators and silly soccer moms, both of which are clueless about life.
Those grandparents knew true love did what was necessary to prepare a child for life. They knew allowing a child to go unchecked without corporal punishment was to hate a child. They knew an untrained child would grow into an undisciplined adult, unprepared for a successful life. They knew undisciplined adults would have much pain and trouble.
The present crop of arrogant, lazy, rebellious, spoiled, violent, and wayward youth proves the lesson. Never has the world seen such a batch of dysfunctional, selfish children and youth who expect everything to be handed to them. The chickens have come home to roost. God and Solomon were right. Any other opinion should be despised (Ps 119:128).
If you love your children, you will use corporal punishment early and quickly – betimes. If you wait too long, they become hardened in foolishness, and then it is too late (Pr 19:18; Eccl 8:11). Parents can avoid troublesome teens by training children and pre-teens the Bible way. If you foolishly spare the rod, you will reap the painful consequences.
The best Father in the world is God. He loved His children so much that He sent His only begotten Son to die for them. How does He treat His beloved children when they disobey Him? Do you know your Bible? He whips them with a scourge and expects them to like it and learn from it (Heb 12:5-13). If they do not learn fast enough, He will take them out of this world (I Cor 11:30-32). Joel Osteen and Rick Warren do not teach this very often.
God’s favorite son other than Jesus was David. He loved David very much. When David sinned, and the Bible records several, God punished Him severely. The beatings he took for adultery with Bathsheba and other sins were very severe. But David loved his beatings, because he knew they were given in love for his profit (Ps 119:67,71,75). If you are a child of God, you should appreciate your Father’s love and show it to your children.